This is an amazing book. This book is great to read no matter if you are extremely happy with your marriage, thinking about ending your marriage, and every aspect in between!
This book describes the Nature of Marriage, the four seasons of marriage, Marital Seasons Profile, putting your plan into action, Q&A and a study guide.
Fall is described as sadness and apprehension. Summer marriages are satisfying and committed. Spring marriages are hopeful and grateful. Winter is described as lonely, rigid, and disappointing.
The Marital Season Profile is seven strategies to enhance or move your marriage into a better season.
There is a questionnaire in the book that you can fill out and have your spouse do the same to determine what season you and your spouse perceive your marriage to be in. When my husband and I filled out the questionnaire, we came up with different seasons. My husband felt like we were in summer and I felt like we were in fall.
This book gave us a jumping off point to discuss things that we needed to talk about. It also gives tips on how to enhance the current season you are in or to move from one season to another.
My favorite quotes from the book are:
• “Our response to change consists of emotions, attitudes, and actions. The combination of these three factors will determine which season our marriage is in at any given time.” 7
• “My mind-set for life has been that I would rather attempt to do something and fail than to do nothing and succeed.” 43
• “… it takes both spouses to move a marriage from fall to spring, but it takes only one to move from fall to winter.” 57-58
• “Forgiveness does not mean that you will never think of the event again, nor does it mean that you will never feel the pain that accompanies the memory. Forgiveness does mean that you will no longer hold that failure or hurt against your spouse.” 80
• “The most common mistake couples make is allowing negative emotions to dictate their behavior. By failing to recognize the power of a positive attitude, they fail to achieve their marriage’s highest potential.” 83
I believe this book is a must read for all married couples and one that will need to be read many times as your marriage changes. This book was a very easy and quick read. I was shocked to find out the “euphoria” feeling of falling in love usually only lasts two years. However, many people believe that feeling is actually love itself.
Visit Gary Chapman‘s website.