Parenting

Tell Them What You Will Do 3

 

Telling your children what YOU will do is a technique of

and many other parenting strategies. Using this strategy properly will put the responsibility on the child and not turn you into the bad guy.

 

Examples

I will pick up the toys that are left on the ground in 10 minutes, instead of, go clean your room.

The car will be backing out of the driveway at 7:30, instead of hounding your children to get ready for school.

I will read a book to kids who have correctly finished their chores in 15 minutes, instead of hounding them to do their chores.

I will play a game with kids who listen the first time.

I will be leaving to get ice cream in 10 minutes, kids with complete homework are welcome to join me.

 

Tips

• hold true to your word and follow through, this may require a backup plan/babysitter
• be consistent
• don’t get angry
• don’t nag
• don’t lecture

 

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Challenge

Week 1: Think of a situation that frustrates you, is there a way to transfer the responsibility onto your child? Just brainstorm this week. Feel free to comment/brainstorm below!

Week 2: How did last week go? Did you come up with some good ideas? This week, implement 1-2 of your ideas. When those situations arrive, take a deep breath, try to relax and calmly tell them what you will do. (Ex: I will be driving the car out of the driveway at 7:15 to take those who are ready to school; I will be picking up and selling/throwing away the toys that are left on the floor in 15 minutes; I will be doing laundry in 20 minutes, I will wash the clothes that are correctly sorted in the laundry room.) Then you need to follow through (if they aren’t ready for school, it’s then their responsibility to figure out how to get their safely; pick up the toys and put them where they cannot get to them; do the laundry and if they don’t have clean clothes, then it’s their responsibility to figure out what to wear).

Week 3: Reflect on how last week went. Did you implement your ideas, did you implement them well, do they need a little tweaking? If you did well, add 2 more. If it was a bit shaky, try again!