My baby is going to be one this month! 🙁 Watching my kids grow is so bittersweet! Before I even got married, I wanted four kids. (Some of my boyfriends were not fans of this and needless to say, we didn’t work out. But that’s just fine, because it was much better to find that fact out then than after a marriage)! Now I have a dilemma on my hands, while I am very thankful and blessed to have four children, I still want more. My husband says he’s done, he doesn’t want any more! I know another child means a bigger vehicle and many other expenses. I just can’t fathom the idea of being done. My youngest is only nursing once a day, but I’ve found myself in tears many times wondering if this will be the last time I ever nurse a child! I have rationally thought about it and my head and my heart are at odds. It would be nice to one day be able to say, “Alright let’s go, everyone in the car” and to have everyone be able to get in the car and buckled up all by themselves. It would also be nice to be able to do things that are just harder to do when you have a baby. And of course, another child, means many, many other responsibilities, but I’m just not ready to be done! I have been asking God to please put us on the same page, which ever page that may be, and I know he will, but it hasn’t happened yet! There are days that are so crazy that I think to myself, “What’s my problem? I can’t even handle the kids I have, let alone adding another one in the mix,” however, there are also those days that go by so smoothly that another child wouldn’t be much more work.

You’re Gonna Miss This sung by Trace Adkins.